Uncle Sam Wants To Protect You From Pumpkin Carving Injuries

Uncle Sam Wants To Protect You From Pumpkin Carving Injuries by: Off The Grid News

TDC Note – WOW! Now we are too stupid to carve a pumpkin without government control – let that sink in for a minute.


Pumpkin carving injuries are apparently a major problem in America. In fact, a federal agency has released an advertisement about pumpkin carving injuries in time for Halloween.

The ad features a talking jack-o-lantern that warns celebrants about pumpkin carving injuries, Vox reports. Remarkably, the U.S. Consumer Product Safety Commission (CPSC) believes jack-o-lanterns are a danger. The CPSC is reportedly responsible for the talking pumpkin ad.

Furthermore, the CPSC has issued a warning list of jack-o-lantern dangers. The dangers include “lacerations related to pumpkin carving,” for instance.

The Federal Government Is Protecting You From Pumpkin Carving Injuries

The CPSC is so concerned about pumpkin carving injuries that it created a warning poster. However, the poster looks more like an advertisement for a slasher movie than a safety warning.

To emphasize the danger from pumpkin carving injuries, the poster says “Pumpkin Laceration: Chapter Seven.” In addition, it states, “any cut could be the deepest.”

Conversely, fake jack-o-lanterns could be a bigger safety risk than pumpkin carving injuries. The CPSC admits that Pier 1 Imports recalled thousands of decorative pumpkins because they were a laceration hazard. In other words, the “safe alternative” to traditional jack-o-lanterns is also dangerous.

Federal Agency Wants You To Avoid “Hatchet Job” To Your Fingers

Additionally, the CPSC has a website dedicated to preventing pumpkin carving injuries. Notwithstanding, the website provides very little information about jack-o-lantern safety.

The website cautions parents against letting young children use knives. It also advises parents to let kids draw on pumpkins with crayons instead of carving.

“Keep the sharp tools in adult hands,” the website advises. Particularly, the Commission wants to keep you from “doing a hatchet job to your fingers.”

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